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  • Saltburn

    Saltburn 2023

    ★★★★½ Watched 20 Nov 2023

    does for bathtubs what call me by your name did for peaches

  • Bottoms

    Bottoms 2023

    ★★★★½ Watched 23 Aug 2023

    rachel sennott & ayo edebiri could do fight club but brad pitt & edward norton couldn’t do bottoms 

  • Barbie

    Barbie 2023

    ★★★★★ Watched 20 Jul 2023

    in 50 years ryan gosling’s ken performance will still be taught in acting classes

  • Five Nights at Freddy's

    Five Nights at Freddy's 2023

    ★½ Watched 25 Oct 2023

    the audience was scarier than the actual movie

  • Nope

    Nope 2022

    ★★★★★ Watched 21 Jul 2022

    this movie does for cloud spotting what jaws did for swimming

  • Morbius

    Morbius 2022

    ★ Watched 30 May 2022 3

    jared leto is like king midas except everything he touches turns to shit

  • Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3

    Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 2023

    ★★★★½ Watched 17 May 2023

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    a cgi raccoon just made me bawl my eyes out

  • X

    X 2022

    ★★★★ Watched 29 Mar 2022 1

    the pornification of the texas chainsaw massacre (1974)

  • Challengers

    Challengers 2024

    ★★★★★ Watched 22 Apr 2024

    zendaya collecting white boys of the month like they’re infinity stones

  • Red, White & Royal Blue

    Red, White & Royal Blue 2023

    ★★★★ Watched 09 Aug 2023

    i want to live in the america where uma thurman is president

  • The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes

    The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes 2023

    ★★★★ Watched 15 Nov 2023

    yassified eminem enters his reputation era

  • Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness

    Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness 2022

    ★★★ Watched 08 May 2022

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    when wanda strolled into the illuminati hq barefoot i just know that quentin tarantino went absolutely FERAL